It’s OK to be a loner…

So – ordinarily, The Bungalow Blogger is all things bungalow renovation, country living and general lifestyle…but whilst out walking our crazy and wonderful spaniel I saw something that inspired me to write (a long and waffly post) about something I feel quite passionate about.

I saw a single poppy, just chilling in a crop field – just there on its own, no other poppies around, growing happily, blossoming and looking pretty healthy! Not only did I feel inspired to take a photo, but, I also thought – it kind of reminded me of….me.

I’ve never been afraid of my own company (I’m an only child), and I’ve never been someone who’s been naturally surrounded by lots of ‘friends’. I admit though, growing up I was always conscious and concerned about my lack of ‘friends’ – and undoubtedly the introduction of social media didn’t help. It often seemed like the ‘poppy‘ular (do you see what I did there) kids were the happy kids – surrounded by large groups of people…even now in my thirties, I come across people all the time that seem to need to be surrounded by numbers of people to feel happy…

As I’ve grown older (and a little wiser) I’ve (for the most part) accepted that it’s OK to be a bit of a…to put it bluntly…loner! I am lucky that I met my best friend and soul mate when I was 17 and even luckier to marry him when I was 29! There’s lots of sayings that suggest girls need friends over boys  – but if you find your best friend and he/she happens to be your boyfriend/partner too what can be better….after all, you’re going to be living with them for the rest of your life (all being well!).

When it comes to friends, I personally have just a handful of people I consider true friends – by which I mean people who I enjoy spending time with, going for dinner with and chatting with. Over the years I’ve considered a few people to be ‘best friends’ – but have questioned whether they’ve considered me to be their ‘best friend’ – and often in time it’s transpired that perhaps I wasn’t. I’d consider myself relatively low-maintenance when it comes to friendship (admittedly not in some other walks of life!). I don’t ask much, if anything of friends…and that’s probably because I have learnt to be quite content in my own company. If people want to spend time with me, or get in touch with me (or reply when I get in touch with them) then great…but if they don’t – I’m OK with that too…

In summary, friends are great…but they can be complicated, and high maintenance (something I learnt the hard way), and some friends can be chilled and easy going (some so much that you rarely hear from them) – I think essentially, to really be happy and get the very most from your friendships, you must first be content in your own company. If you can truly embrace who you are then the right friendships will follow – but if you are dependant on others for happiness you may never find true happiness….!



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